romálon // cellphones

(échange du mois de décembre)

avalon: Happy holidays Román (nope, je vais pas t'appeler Boss, même pas en rêve, cesse d'y croire tout de suite, alright?)

román: Oh thanks, happy holidays Avalon (well, je te l'aurai pas demandé mais maintenant que t'en parles, j'ajouterai peut-être une clause dans ton contrat )

avalon: T'ajoutes rien du tout, le contrat est déjà signé, tu peux pas en refaire un (fallait y penser avant, uh).

román: C'est comme ça que tu parles à ton boss ?

avalon: ... Ca y est, le titre t'es monté à la tête. I should have shut up.
Désolée, t'as pas de grade alors forcément, ça fait moins boss que mes boss précédents

román: Ouuh the shade, tu me brises le cœur

avalon: What heart? Tu stalkes des mamies dans la rue pour briser des ménages je te rappelle

román: Oh et toi tu fais quoi encore, rappelle-moi ?

avalon: Je surveille tes arrières et me tient prête à payer ta caution si jamais on te jette en prison

román: Complice du stalking de mamies et du bris de ménages, je suis sûr que c'était ta vocation première

avalon: Je dirai que tu m'y as contrainte et forcée et que bon, vu nos gabarits, j'ai pas osé me rebeller

román: C'est mesquin, moi qui t'engage et te forme par bonté d'âme

avalon: Oh, je suis tellement touchée que je sois ton oeuvre caritative. Vraiment. This is my over-the-moon face

román: Tu devrais, je fais rarement d'aussi grands gestes. Mais ne me remercie pas, tout le plaisir est pour moi

avalon: J'en avais pas l'intention, don't you worry

román: Si cet échange est une indication de notre dynamique de travail, j'ai juste hâte d'être en filature avec toi

avalon: Ew, no thanks. Je préfère m'épargner ton humour pendant quelques heures

román: N'importe quoi, t'adore mon humour

avalon: Oui, c'est d'ailleurs parce que je l'adore que je ne ris jamais à une de tes blagues... Logique

román: Don't bullshit a bullshitter, je te vois te retenir de rire à chaque fois

avalon: Bullshitter est donc ton vrai prénom, je retiens. Et tu me vois surtout me retenir de bâiller à chaque fois, y a une petite différence

román: She's got joookes, j'avais un doute sur ton humanité jusqu'ici

avalon: Qui te dit que je suis pas juste un androïde très avancé ? Après tout je sors de l'armée, ils ont toujours des secrets....

román: Et tu me l'avoues, à moi ? Je savais que notre relation était spéciale

avalon: Ou peut-être que c'est parce que je suis now obligée de te tuer et c'était mon but all along. How can you know?

román: Nah I trust you with my life, tu tiens déjà trop à moi

avalon: Certainement nous n'avons pas la même définition du mot "tenir". Mais c'est bon à savoir que je pourrai te tuer dans ton sommeil sans même que tu te doutes que ce soit moi

román: Yeah yeah, as I said, I trust you. Au pire, tout le monde m'aime tellement que si on m'assassine, tu seras direct soupçonnée en tant que dernière addition à ma longue liste d'amis

avalon: Pourquoi je ne te crois pas ? hmmm, lemme guess. Je ferai passer ta mort pour un accident. Et puis, qui croirait qu'une petite blondinette comme moi pourrait avoir le dessus sur un type comme toi, hein ?

román: Quelle fourberie, tu me déçois énormément

avalon: Mens pas, je sais que tu pourrais être more proud even if you wanted to

román: Meh, peux mieux faire

avalon: C'est ce que tu te dis tous les jours ?

román: Non, je te laisse tout le plaisir de kill my vibe et crush my dreams

avalon: Trop d'honneur, je suis touchée.

(échange du mois de janvier)

avalon: Bonne année, même si je sais pas trop si tu le mérites

román: Bonne année, j'ai une idée pour ta résolution: arrêter de mentir à mon boss en prétendant ne pas l'adorer

avalon: Wow, quelle attaque. Voici la tienne : arrêter de prendre tes rêves pour des réalités.

román: Rabat-joie

avalon: That's it? Je m'attendais à plus de répartie. I'm disappointed.

román: Je réponds mal à la négativité, Chambers. Ce genre d'attaque ne mérite simplement pas mon précieux temps

avalon: "Précieux" ? Tu poursuis des lutins au marché de noël pendant ce temps si précieux (ou des mamies de ce que j'ai entendu dire, mais je ne juge pas, promis)

román: There's no crime too small, like it or not (ouais ouais, t'es surtout jalouse tu peux le dire)

avalon: Ah donc en fait le job auquel tu veux me former consiste à arrêter tous ceux qui ont juste du mauvais goût ? Tu risques pas de manquer de travail (jalouse que t'aies des touches avec des mamies ? sache que les mamies m'aiment aussi beaucoup en général)

román: Hey, prend la fashion police au sérieux s'il te plait (avec cette attitude ? ça m'étonnerait beaucoup)

avalon: je la prends très très au sérieux, je n'oserai jamais me moquer du travail de la police. Mais vu le mauvais goût général des gens, je pense sincèrement que tu verras jamais le jour de la retraite arriver. (wanna bet? may the most charming one win)

román: well, more work means more money (je pars clairement gagnant)

avalon: si j'avais su, je t'aurai offert une canne pour noël, pour soulager ton vieux dos dans tes (pas si) futurs vieux jours de surveillance (you wish, juste parce que je le suis pas avec toi ne veut pas dire que je le suis pas dans la vie de tous les jours)

román: trop de bienveillance, vraiment, ça me touche (oh yeah, tu vas aussi offrir des cannes aux mamies pour les charmer ?)

avalon: Je sais, je suis bienveillante. C'est mon deuxième prénom (augmente mon salaire et I might)

román: moi qui croyais que c'était "pénible", my bad (je vais te donner l'avantage)

avalon: Parfois oui, mais uniquement avec ceux qui le mérite (excuse me? tu penses que tu me fais une faveur ? oh wow, you know what? c'est bon, j'garde mon salaire ridicule actuel, j'offre rien aux mamies, comme ça tu pourras me voir t'écraser)

román: Your stress is showing

avalon: My what now? Alright. Quand je gagne, tu m'augmentes. Préviens la comptabilité, je veux une vraie augmentation, pas 3$ de plus à l'année

román: J'ai jamais accepté ce genre de termes, de base c'était même pas un défi espèce d'enragée

avalon: It's a bet, I said "wanna bet" tu as répondu (rêvé) que tu partais gagnant. Mais si t'as peur de perdre, je comprendrai. Ça ne ferait que 2 - 0 en ma faveur, must be hard for your ego

román: You know what ? I'm the winner either way 'cause I don't let my ego get the best of me and turn me into some crazy monster. Soooo, see ya later loser

avalon: You seriously calling me a monster right now? I quit. You pussy. Can't work with someone who call a passionate woman a monster. Good luck with your job.

román: Now don't get me wrong, I love your passion. I just don't feel safe around you

avalon: You don't feel safe? Because you're afraid to lost a bet? Oh my. I shouldn't have worried about that woman, she would have scared you in no time

román: I don't feel safe 'cause when I win, you're gonna attack me again

avalon: Not gonna happen, I will win, you can relax

román: Yeah right. T'es au courant que sans rien faire j'me suis attiré l'affection de Mémé. Toi, ça me paraît moins bien parti

avalon: Well, Mémé has poor tastes. Et je suis quasi sure qu'elle était intoxiquée par les fêtes, le vin chaud, etc. J'ai aucun doute quant au fait qu'elle reprendra ses esprits bientôt

román: Quand je pense qu'elle t'a qualifiée de "charmante blondinette", honte à toi

avalon: Well, je suis charmante et il se trouve que je suis blonde donc... It's just the truth, ça ne veut pas dire qu'elle sait choisir ses hommes

román: C'est marrant, c'est clairement pas le qualificatif que j'aurai employé pour toi, et j'crois que nos premiers clients non plus

avalon: Encore une fois, juste parce que j'suis pas charmante avec toi veut pas dire que j'le suis. J'suis juste sélective avec mon entourage

román: J'y crois moyen

avalon: Crois-moi pas si tu veux, en attendant c'est la vérité

román: Mon flair de détective et les interactions dans lesquelles je t'ai vue suggèrent le contraire, mais bon

avalon: Les seules interactions dans lesquelles tu m'aies vue c'était celles que j'ai avec toi, forcément... (flair de détective, ahahah, je la connaissais pas, celle-là)

román: J'ai tellement de choses à t'apprendre, c'est toi qui devrais me payer en fait

avalon: Sauf que c'est toi qui a besoin d'un coup de main,, meaning je suis celle qui te fait une faveur

román: Disons que c'est comme ça que je l'ai présenté pour que t'acceptes (see, you like me, you wanted to help)

avalon: (Don't get your hopes up, I just have pity for you) oh donc monsieur est manipulateur, hmm, good to know

román: (you like me, don't worry I won't tell anyone) hey, tous les moyens sont bons, c'est la première leçon dans ce boulot

avalon: (I won't even answer, I know you won't listen anyway, so sure, if that makes you happy, believe it) hmhm, je te préviens, si je me fais arrêtée un jour, je dirai que c'est toi qui m'a tout appris. corrompre une pauvre jeune femme, t'as pas honte ?

román: (Oooh I believe it alright, don't worry) I'll bail you out, sois pas dramatique

avalon: (you're a child) c'est la moindre des choses, en même temps, c'est toi qui m'entraîne sur cette route de débauche je te ferai remarquer

román: (right back at you) tout de suite les grands mots, "débauche", dis-le si tu as peur d'un peu d'aventure

avalon: (proving my point exactly) ton aventure frôle l'illégalité, l'aventure que j'aime est total légale (et entraîne bien plus d'action, aussi, tu es le Hobbit quand j'suis LOTR, sois pas jaloux)

román: "frôle" being the key word ya boring (j'suis pas jaloux, le Hobbit c'est la base)

avalon: Sure, I am the boring one, of course, makes sense (j'aurai dû me douter que tu dirais ça, tiens)

román: Makes total sense (parce que c'est la vérité, tiens)

avalon: In your crazy illogical world it does, yeah (hmhm, agree to disagree)

román: Heureusement que je sais que tu m'adores parce qu'il me semble que t'es de plus en plus violente huh (yeah let's say that)

avalon: Tu vis vraiment dans un monde plein d'illusions. C'est presque touchant (emphasis sur le presque, please)

román: Je vois absolument pas de quoi tu parles

avalon: Le contraire m'aurait étonnée

(échange du mois d'avril)

román: Question de personnalité capitale: Titanic, la scène de la planche, Jack pouvait survivre ou pas ? (la réponse est évidemment oui mais comme t'as pas de cœur, je suis sûr que tu vas me trouver une super excuse pour le laisser mourir)

avalon: Je suis pas sûre que la planche (porte ? j'dois avouer que j'ai jamais vu Titanic) puisse supporter 2 poids (dépendant dans quoi elle a été faite et le poids de Jack et Kate (j'sais plus son nom, ça va, juge tant que tu veux)).
C'est quoi le rapport avec la personnalité ?

román: Le rapport c'est la façon dont t'abordes la question (et le fait que t'y ais répondu presque sérieusement)
Et le fait que t'as jamais vu Titanic, aussi

avalon: Je suis plus surprise que toi, tu l'aies vu, en réalité

román: Je suis un homme de culture, voyons

avalon: Of course, où avais-je la tête

(échange du mois d'avril - part 2)

avalon: Tu savais que le plus grand bâtiment construit par une architecte se trouvait à Chicago ? De quoi méditer pour tes prochains jours d'ennui (:

román: I... did not. C'était le fun fact du jour ?

avalon: Exactement, je me suis dis qu'une fois par semaine j'allais t'en donner quelques uns. You know. Pour ton futur date avec Mémé

román: Vraiment trop de bienveillance, content de voir que tu n'es pas jalouse de notre amour, ta bénédiction représente beaucoup pour nous

avalon: C'est vrai que j'aurai aimé un date avec Mémé, moi aussi, mais elle a flashé sur toi en premier, j'suis bonne joueuse

román: J'apprécie ton fair-play

(échange du mois d'avril - part 3)

román: Toi qui connais si bien Chicago, t'es déjà allée au Richard H. Driehaus Museum ? Ils m'(nous)ont engagés et je dirais pas non à un guide

avalon: Une fois, il y a deux ans, l'expo a du changer, mais je peux toujours faire quelques recherches sur l'expo actuelle au besoin (je veux faire partie de l'affaire quitte à y bosser la nuit, don't you take it from me please, pour une fois qu'un musée nous embauche)

román: Je t'envoie les détails (damn, si j'avais su que ça te plairait autant j'aurais attendu pour en faire ton cadeau d'anniversaire ou quoi)

avalon: Y a d'autres musées (dont certains que je n'ai pas encore visiter, je te laisse essayer de deviner, amuse-toi bien, moi j'file faire notre enquête)

román: Très bien, défi accepté

avalon: [voicemail]
Hey Román, it's me. Avalon, I mean. Em. Just wanted to, I don't know. I met your sister earlier today and, em, I didn't know she was living with you. Not that it matters. I don't know, we talked about you a bit and... I though back about Valentine's Day and it was fun, somehow, guess I never really thanked you for being, you know, not a jerk. This is the worst voicemail, I can't leave that. (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Hey Román, Avalon speaking. Which you should know because you have my number so that's stupid. Let's start over. (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Román, it's Ava.
Lon.
Avalon.
Oh my god what am I doing? (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Hey Román. Just wanted to ask you to not trust what Ahmed can say about you and me. Or just me. I don't know why he thinks there's something between us but nope. Not gonna happen. I don't do that. Fall for my boss. Well, I did do that once and it didn't go well. Ahmed is crazy, don't listen to him, ever. (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Okay, I know you didn't get the previous voicemail but still. Maybe it can happen. But it won't. This ain't me. Well drinking ain't me neither and look at me now. I mean. You can't look at me and you shouldn't look at me.
You know what? Scratch that. You should look at me. Because for something to ever happen between us as Ahmed soooo think it will I'd need to be one hundred per cent sure that you feel something for me. So. Nah, ain't gonna happen. And you won't get this voice (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Just tell me you like me. Please. So that way, if you don't, I won't be falling in love with you to only get hurts afterward.
That's stupid. (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Rom, in case you sister told you I was jealous of her, don't listen to her. She's as crazy as Ahmed. That's probably why they belong together. (voicemail dleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Okay so this is probably voicemail number forty six at this point. So yeah, you're nice and charming and funny and good looking (and very handsome when you wear sunglasses with that black jacket) but that doesn't mean anything. Because you know. Not that kinda girl, yeaah. (voicemail deleted)

avalon: [ voicemail ]
Good evening Román. This is Avalon.
I was just calling to check in. I might need your help on a case.
See you at the office tomorrow.
Regards,
Avalon Chambers

(échange du mois de juillet)

román: You okay ? Are you drunk or did I do something ?

avalon: It's seems like a trick question.
Did you do something and I don't know about it?
Oh. Wait. It doesn't make any sense, does it?

román: I probably did something but yeah you don't know about it so... I guess you're not making sense

avalon: I have no idea if you did something. I thought you did. Maybe. I'm tired. Have a strange day. Had a drink or two. What are you suddenly worried? Do you have something to hide?
Hey I'm making perfectly good sense thank you very much.

román: What did you think I did ? Yeah I kinda guessed about the drinks, with the weird messages

avalon: Good perfect sense... Perfect good sense. Perfectly sense?
Bottom line: I make sense

román: Of course you make sense, my humblest apologies

avalon: Well you're lucky. I like you. I forgive you.

román: Oh yeah ? You can't ever take that back, you know ?

avalon: Weeeeeell, I don't want you to fire me if I don't forgive you so there's that.
Plus, I may have a bit of alcohohol in my blood right this minute. I don't know if I remember a lot when I drink. I don't usually drink you know.
Heeey you didn't answer my question that I thought and maybe asked. Why you texted me?

román: I'm preeetty sure it's the drinks 'cause you've never feared me before. And I wouldn't worry about remembering, you got the texts right here for that
You called me first

avalon: I can delete them. I'm very good at that.
No I didn't. I called your answering machine. She's very nice, by the way. Like your black jacket.

román: I'll screenshot your "I like you. I forgive you" and keep it forever
Yeah she's alright. You spoke to my jacket too ?

avalon: Why does it sound like a threat?
Stop mocking me. Ofc I didn't speak to your jacket, just think it's a nice jacket and that's it. You're such a man.

román: Maybe you feel threatened by how much you like me
It sure is. What did I do ?

avalon: I don't feel threatened by anything. Except maybe spiders, they have to many legs, it's not normal.
You don't get that sometimes clothes are nice because they go well on the person wearing it. Men don't get that, their brain is too small to understand things like that. That's why women are better at everything. Smart and doing it with style.
That's fact btw. Not a scientific one (not yet) but men do have smaller brains. That's why they hate women and are scared of them and treat them badly and called them witches. Because they know they can't do better. Because of the size of their brain.

román: Those poor deformed spiders.
Well, my brain may be small but I like women and I'm not scared of them (or maybe a little), and witches are great. And I certainly can't do better than women but I'm cool with that
Thanks for the compliment (?) tho

avalon: You ain't like the other men. I would have quit if you were. Was afraid for a moment that you might be but she was your sister so you're not. You're not women-level cool but you're kinda cool.

román: And just like that, more screenshots for me. But what's that about my sister ?

avalon: I'll delete it too. She's nice. And pretty.

román: She is, but don't tell her I said it.
You're always nice when you're drunk ?

(7 septembre 2021)

román: [ voicemail ]
Hey, it's me... I was kinda hoping to speak to you directly but it's late, so, yeah. I was just calling to know if you got home okay. I-I thought we should talk but it can wait, right ? Alright, goodnight.

(7 septembre 2021)

román: [ voicemail ]
Still me, I guess I won't reach you tonight... Yeah, so, I forgot to say I followed the guy and he was just going home. Call me if the client said anything ? Or you'll tell me at work, whatever. Goodnight.

(échange du mois de septembre)

avalon: Client had a lot to say. Fired us. Still working on it right now, let you know how it goes.

román: Fired us ? Don't worry about it alright, it's his loss, let it go.

avalon: We just lost a client, how can you be so calm?

román: Because he fired us while I was still following his guy for a long fucking time. So he's just a stupid client and I don't want him.

avalon: That's precisely because you've been following his guy that you should be pissed! We wasted our time, it's infuriating.

román: Arguing with him is just a bigger waste of time Ava

avalon: Losing a client means no money. Bad ad. Bad reputation for the office. I know you think you've got it all under control but what if he goes on saying everyone that we're unprofessionnal, uh?

román: I know all that but what do you want me to do ? I'll talk to him later, right now it's just more fuel to the flame if he's already pissed.

avalon: Nothing. I want you to do nothing. Talk to him later or don't, it's fine.

román: Yeah for some reason I have a hard time believing that.

avalon: Believe it or not, idc. I can't make you do things or say things anyway so really. Fine.

román: I don't get why it's me you're angry at. If you want me to do something just say it.

avalon: I'm not angry at you, I just don't understand how you can be so okay. Always so calm and undisturbed but you're right, that's probably way healthier so don't change anything.

román: I've been doing this for four years, it's not the first angry client, nor the last. We did what he wanted and it wasn't enough, if I start being angry about it I'll never stop. Doesn't mean I'm undisturbed.

avalon: Well it sure looks like it. But it's okay, don't worry.

román: Well I'm not, guess you don't know everything. I'll talk to him, just don't torture yourself over it, yeah ? There's nothing you can do about it tonight.

avalon: What is that supposed to mean?
Oh I'm not, I'm super fine, like you said, don't need a stupid client with his stupid case spying on some guy who doesn't do anything anyway.

román: Nothing.
I mean he might've fired us anyway 'cause we really didn't have anything to show for all those hours of work, the guy really didn't do anything ever.

avalon: But at least we would have given him a result (as in no result because nothing to see, nothing to tell) before he fired us

román: We can still do that, I don't care what he says, I'll finish up the paperwork we started and send it to him so he'll see we were doing exactly what he asked us to and he won't have anything on us being "unprofessional".

avalon: To say what? I know you fired us but here is the big nothing we got for you?
And he does. But you were right, that's nothing, it's not important. Still infuriating but nothing we can say will make him change his stupid mind anyway so.

román: It's not our fault if he had a pointless case.
He doesn't, maybe if he stopped telling us what to do for five minutes things would be different. We work well together, this doesn't change anything

avalon: If you say so

(31 décembre 2021)

avalon: [voicemail]
Hi Rom.
I don't know if you've been to the office yet and therefore if you've seen the present on your desk. Just want to apologize for it? I mean not really really just that I didn't know if you... You know.
What I trully mean is I'm sorry if you don't like it. I've thought about buying something else, like something for your moto but then thought against it because, well, it would have been for your moto not really for you. And then I remembered you paint or draw sometimes and, hm, well, I don't know. Sorry if it's intrusive in a way.
Anyway, I don't really know why I called but I needed you to know that you exchange it if you want to and that I'm terrible at this.
I hope you're having a nice new year's eve and that I didn't ruin it in any way because I am now realising that I just called you, again, and. Okay. Hanging up now.
Bye

(31 décembre 2021)

avalon: [voicemail]
Sooo. My phone called you. And I got your answering machine and this is nice. I mean, that's okay, I didn't expect you to answer your phone. You know, I also thought about buying like something else. Because you said you'd wear it but you weren't serious, right? I mean you can't have been serious, right?
Not that it matters it doesn't you know, I'm completly cool with everything. Not entirely sure about the fact that I most likely ruined your shirt when, you know, on Evan's day but I'll buy you a new one I promise. Something black.
Or white. I don't know why I said black.
And before you say anything I'm not drunk.
Just a tad tipsy.
Just had a few glasses. Not that many really. I haven't gotten into the dancing mood yet.
Not that you need to know any of this again, so sorry and em, lemme know if you hate your present. Bye. Again. But for real this time (chuckles)

(31 décembre 2021)

avalon: [voicemail]
Ok so this is the last time I call you I SWEAR. But while I was drinking I thought 'bout something and, em. I kinda know why I said black. In the previous voicemail, please follow my thought (yes you now need to imagine me rolling my eyes at you but not too vigourously because the head aches a bit). Black looks good on you. And I'm suuuure white would too but I have the feeling it wouldn't be the same. Please do not ever wear a white jacket.
Guess I like the almost rock'n'roll style ahah.
Is this a thing? I don't know. Don't answer. Well I know that you can't technically answer me because I'm talking alone and, you know, you ain't here. And I don't know where you are. And that's just fine, I'm sure you're having fun and I am too so. I don't even know why I'm on the phone with your answering machine.
Well, I kinda know, I wanted to just check if things were okay for you and - (end of voicemail)

(31 décembre 2021)

avalon: [voicemail]
YOUR ANSWERING MACHINE JUST HUNG UP ON ME. THAT'S SO RUDE. I'm soooo disappointed that you didn't raise her better. COME ON. I was being nice and all and I knooow I shouldn't have called you because it's getting very blurry. The lines. And it's even worse today and I probably won't even remember it tomorrow and I probably should have asked Ahmed to take my phone away from me.
Yup.
Should have.
Ya know what? I'm gonna ask him right now. If I find him.
Not that he can be somewhere else, your sister isn't here so he's definitely not hooking up with her.
I'm going to regret saying that to you tomorrow. Sorry. Can't really take it back now, right?
By the way, you owe me a tango.
OH I see Ahmed.
(from a bit of distance)
Say hi to Román. Well Rom's answering machine that just hung up on me because she's rude but we forgive her. And please take my phone, I know I wanted to to take it before I started to drink but -- (end of voicemail)

(échange du mois de décembre/janvier)

román: Hey,
I didn't have my phone so I'm sorry if you really wanted to speak to me directly. I see you had fun with the answering machine again, though, sorry for its rudeness. I got your voicemails, all four of them, I'm starting to think drunk-ish Ava likes me better than sober Ava. I know you won't see this for a few hours and you might not remember anything by then so just ignore this I guess if you don't know what I'm talking about.
Anyways, I went to get your gift and I love it, thank you. I would have loved anything you got me, really, you didn't have to worry so much (and you didn't have to get me anything, not even a black shirt).
Hope you got in the "dancing mood" in the end, happy new year. Say hi to Ahmed

avalon: I'm so sorry I called you, I - it's kinda fuzzy in my head.
Happy new year and again, so sorry. Next time I'll have someone take my phone away from me, promise

román: No worries, you leave fun voicemails

avalon: Fun? Are you sure they were from me? Or you weren't the drunk one?

román: Nah I didn't drink I learned my lesson last year. And they were, shame you can't listen to them

avalon: Really? What happened last year? What did you do?
Ah ah, stop teasing, doesn't look good on you

román: Short story: fell in a pool
Nonsense, of course it looks good on me

avalon: You fell in a pool? How, when HOW? With whom were you? I need video of that (at least picture) (for science obviously)
Yeah... Nah it doesn't, sorry to be the one to inform you of that fact

román: Drank too much, fought somebody, fell in the pool with him, had to be fished out by my dad. But I don't think anybody had their phone out, sorry
I don't believe you

avalon: Pretty sure I'll find someone you had don't worry. Fished out uh?
Well, do, I'm always right

román: With your great detective skills uh ? Yeah, I can swim, okay, I just didn't think to. It's not funny I could've drowned
Still don't

avalon: Ofc with my great detective skills, what else? You didn't think to... How intoxicated were you??? It sure is because you and I both know your father wouldn't have let that happen
Well, don't, but I know I'm right. Teasing never looks good on anyone

román: Yeah well if my dad hadn't been there I'd be dead and who would've helped with those great detective skills of yours uh ?
But everything looks good on me

avalon: Someone else would have saved you I'm sure.
I would have found someone else to teach me. I'd probably be even better...
Alright. So. I really didn't want to be the one breaking the news to you but. Nope. That ain't right. Cockyness doesn't look good on you, neither does red by the way or teasing

román: That's slander I'm not speaking to you, way to start the new year

avalon: Yeah good luck with that.

román: Or you could apologize

avalon: Because I said red isn't your color? It isn't but don't take it personally, red isn't most people's color so that's not on you, it just isn't a shade that suits human being

román: 'cause you hurt my feelings

avalon: See it this way: red isn't a good color on you. BUT. every other ones are. which is a lot.

román: Drunk Ava already complimented me a whole lot don't worry
But this one's nice too. I appreciate this rephrasing

avalon: Seriously??????? You said I hurt your feelings and it was just for show?
You're a child Rivera.

román: I wanted to see what you'd do. Positively surprised

avalon: I regret everything.
Said that to make you feel better. Can always take it back you know.

román: I've got it in writing and on voicemails I don't think you can erase any of that
Just admit you like me enough to be nice, nobody will know I swear

avalon: Don't trust you and that has nothing to do with it

román: Yeah alright, let's leave it at that

avalon: Why?
What does it change if I'm being nice?

román: Controversial statement: I like it. Do I need a reason ?

avalon: No, just wondering.
But correct me if I'm wrong. You like it when I'm being nice to you and I'm only being nice when drunk... I will never accept a coffee coming from you from now on. In case you're trying to get me drunk to get me nice

román: You're not only nice when drunk
And I wouldn't spike your drink, have we met ?

avalon: Well how am I supposed to now? Didn't think you'd lie to me just so I'd be a tad nicer to you to boost your ego

román: I wasn't lying I was exaggerating, you did criticize three things about me, umprompted

avalon: And I did not criticize I was just opening your eyes by telling you the truth so you wouldn't be hurt

román: Of course you would see it that way

avalon: You mean: the right way?

román: Can't agree with you this time

avalon: You never do, I'd have been surprised if you did

román: Well I'd agree with you if you were right

avalon: Keep lying to yourself if it helps you sleep at night

román: I gladly will, thanks for your permission

avalon: A child.

román: Well now nothing I could say to that would sound grown up

avalon: Probably because, hm, how do I say it? Oh.
Yeah.
I'm right.

román: Damn, always so perceptive, you got me

avalon: Yeah I know, it's a curse

román: Poor you

avalon: Cut it with the sarcasm

román: I'm a child that's what I do

avalon: Omg you never stop don't you?

román: Nope

(échange du mois de janvier)

avalon: Okay, so, hm. Quick question: have you told anyone?

román: Is there a wrong answer ?

avalon: No? It wasn't supposed to be a trick question, I just wanna know who might know.

román: Then no, mostly 'cause I didn't see anyone this week. I'm guessing you told somebody ?

avalon: Too busy with work? I may have told Ahmed. But he's the only one.
He might text you about it by the way.

román: Yeah, them too, my sister basically said she didn't wanna see me hanging around the kitchen anymore and you know, I fear for my life.
Well it's fine with me, you can tell whoever
Text me?

avalon: Poor you. Pretty sure it's because you eat more than you help...
Well, thanks for giving me the permission I wasn't asking for
Yeaaaah, idk really. Maybe he was just kiddin', you know him

román: I don't know what you mean.
Yeah alright
What like to threaten me ?

avalon: Course you don't, you're a sweetheart right?
Yeah something like that. Very old school, you hurt her I hurt you. Told him it wasn't believable

román: Duh. You know me
Well I kinda did the same with him and Lena so I get it

avalon: I sure do
You did? Ah, that male need...
Although maybe don't mention it

román: Maybe tell them if you see them you know, discreetly slip into the conversation how much of a sweetheart I am
I was jokiiing
Don't mention what?

avalon: Hmm. Or I can let them find out by themselves?
When you told him you'd hurt him? Or when you said you told him something in this way?
Elena. Or the parallele between you and me and him and Elena.
Maybe both.

román: Well they've had a few years to notice now, I think you need to help open their eyes
No I did "threaten" him but in a jokey way
I'm.. lost

avalon: Hmmmm. I'll do my best, but maybe I'm just seduced and am the one in need to open my eyes
Elena didn't tell you?
They're not a thing anymore (if one can say that they were)

román: Nah, you're not
That woman never tells me anything
Yah I know it wasn't super serious but I always thought it would be eventually

avalon: I'm not seduced?
Your words not mine, just remember it
Yeah well join the club. But Elena wasn't interested.

román: I'm sure hoping you are.
But I meant that it's not blindly
Good to know. And he didn't take it well ?

avalon: No you're right you can't
Hmm, guess you also don't know he had a real crush/feelings for her did you?
To be fair, I didn't really asked him if he was enjoying it but I figured having his heart crush by someone he liked was no fun so yeah... he'll probably tell you he isn't the one doing the hurting in their case

román: Nope, apparently nobody tells me anything
Well, at least now he knows where he stands

avalon: Ow, poor you, kept away from all the secrets. I don't think Ahmed felt comfortable talking about that with you though (wonder why that is)
He sure does. Doesn't make it easier.
But hey, now you know everything I do!

román: Hey I'm a very good friend alright, and I know Lena, I could've helped
No, guess it doesn't.
Yeah, see, we make a wonderful team, love that

avalon: You do know I'm just guessing right? I'm sure you could have but you're also Elena's brother, big brother and preeeetty sure Ahmed thought it might be weird for the both of you talking about him having sex with your sister.
But if you have advice I guess you can feel free to tell him so
You didn't already know we do?

román: I know.
Well it's a bit late now, let's leave it at that
Of course I did, but now you tell me people's secrets
So Ahmed just texted. He's real happy about us  but I figure you know that already

avalon: Next time.
Which probably makes a terrible friend.
Lucky I only have two of those.
Yeaaah he told he was freaking out like it's supposed to be a huge deal or something  

román: You're not a terrible friend
And it's not a huge deal ?

avalon: Friends aren't supposed to keep their friends' secrets?
Well, it is for me, I didn't think it'd be for other people
Apart from Mémé, I kinda feel bad for breaking you two apart.
(No I'm lying, I really don't)

román: Not from me  
No but it's different 'cause you didn't want me to talk to him about it, so you told me to protect him, I feel like that's okay. And I would've known eventually
Seems like some people are reaaally invested
Not even a little? That's cold, I thought she was your bff

avalon: I'll take that argument if he says anything. I'll hire you as my lawyer, stay around
Yeah, well, Ahmed was trying to push me into your directions for a couple of month. I'm even surprise he hasn't bet about it
I don't think bff start rumors about one another. I'll write her a letter to say how sorry I am. She can have you on Mondays if she wants to

román: I'll gladly do
Yeah I'm pretty sure he was getting desperate
Yeah, okay, see, that does not work for me

avalon: Probably yeah. Well good things take time
Ouch. When will it work for you then? We can arrange something

román: So they do
What about never ? Just a thought

avalon: Never works for me  

román: That's what I thought  

avalon: I was trying to be nice and share for once

román: That's very generous of you

avalon: Thanks for noticing

(échange du mois de février)

avalon: How long before your last meeting end? Thought we could eat together?

román: Of course
I can be out of there in 20, where do you wanna go ?

avalon: I don't know, what do you prefer? A real diner or more like just something to grab a bite?

román: Diner ?

avalon: Diner date it is. Maybe the Chicago Diner?

román: Sounds good. I'm gonna be cheesy and say I'd go anywhere with you
I'm also gonna be nice and not invite you to my parents' restaurant

avalon: Aw you big softy
And yes, I mean not that I don't want to go to your parents' restaurant, I'm sure it's a very nice place and everything but you know. We haven't even gone on a proper date yet, so hmmmm. Yeah. Later, maybe?
But seriously though, I thought about the Boka but it's more expensive and idk, something cosy for tonight seems more apropriate. Or you can order take out from your parents' restaurant

román: Yeaaah I know
Hey I'm just messing with you Ava   let's go to the Chicago Diner

avalon: That was not funny Rom! For a second there I was REALLY nervous!
But okay for the Chicago Diner. I'll make a reservation. Meet you there?

román: Sorry  
Great, thanks. Meet you there

avalon: You don't seem that much sorry... i'll get my revenge don't worry

román: I am !
Is there something I can do something to avoid your wrath?  

avalon: Nope it's late now. The only you can do is wait for it to come ‍�

román: Just remember you're veeery seduced by me

avalon: Eh. Should have thought about the consequences before being mean and very much not funny. I'll send you an Angry Ahmed and you'll regret your bad jokes forever

román: And here I was telling him not to worry, I'm a bad boyfriend and a liar  

avalon: Drama queen much?
Alright. Won't send you Ahmed this time. But I'll still get my revenge.
(And you're not a bad boyfriend at all, although my opinion on that matter might be slightly biaised
)

román: Don't know what you're on about
Yeah alright I'll take that, tho I'm more scared of you than him
(Well your opinion's the one that matters so I'm not complaining  )

avalon: Play innocent, we know you're not
Aw, and you should be.
(Surprisingly, I didn't think you would be).

román: Again, I've got no idea what you mean
Yeah I know that's what's scary
(Surprising indeed)

avalon: Like I'll destroy you anywhere else than Super smash Bros

román: Only 'cause I don't have experience in those games

avalon: Trust me, this game doesn't need any kind of experience. Just push as many buttons as you can, as fast as you can and hope your character stay alive

román: My kind of game, alright, we'll see what you've got

avalon: Game on. And get ready to lose

román: I won't tho

avalon: Too much confidence, I hope your ego won't be too damaged when you realise you're wrong about that

román: I'm only matching your overconfidence

avalon: My overconfidence comes from the fact that a) I know the game so I know I win and b) well ì know you and I know you lose. It's merely statistics at this point

román: Why are we playing if you're so sure of the outcome ?

avalon: Well because you said you were scared and I was trying to reassure you by sayin' I'll only destroy your pretty face at this game

román: I feeeel like I should just be grateful then